BIRTHDAY BOO BOO'S

matutuwa ka ba kung tapos na ang 1/3 ng buhay mo?

"the average life-expectancy among filipino men is 79 years old" - NSO 2003

WHAAAA! ibig sabihin halos dalawang 27 years na lang ang itatagal ng katawang lupa ko! dalawang mabilis na 27 years... katakot! dapat gawin na lahat ng pwede gawin!

27 oct 15's na pinag daanan ko..
23 lang dun ang naaalala ko..
halos lahat dun umuulan .. baka daw may lahi akong engkato sabi nung classmante ko nung hi-skul

nung bata ako lagi ako excited mag bday, kasi may spaghetti, fried chicken, diluted orange juice, goldilocks cake na may nakasulat na "happy birthday ron-ron" pero mas malaki yung font size ng "FROM YOUR NINANG _____!"

pero habang tumatanda ka, di ka na mae-excite.. hihiritan ka kasing mag libre at magpainom, all of a sudden, lahat sila close friends mo! kaya mas gugustuhin ko na lang mag tago sa likod ng gasul buong maghapon!

dati, ang alam ko, ikaw ang iti-treat ng mga kaibigan pag birthday mo, hindi pala ganun, dahil may mga kaibigan, na nang-lilimas ng bulsa at walang pakundangang nagkakamal ng sweldo mo para i-refill ang bahay-alak at pakainin ang mga bulate nila sa tyan.. habang buong gabi ipinaaalala nila sayo na tumatanda ka na at at paubos na ng paubos ang natitira mong oras sa mundong ibabaw! ANG SAYA NO?! shet

sa loob ng 27 years, maraming kakaiba, nakakatuwa at nakakatawang regalo ang natanggap ko.. eto ang top 10:

10...photo album at picture frame, na may flower sa sulok (itaas ang kamay ng hindi nakatanggap nito!)

9....panyo, hindi to nawawala.. napaka 'unique' (bukod pa yung pag pasko)

8....snake and ladder, chessboard at yung gameboard na free sa ovaltine (effort!)

7....sand clock, errr!

6....avon na lotion (hindi ko alam kung aanuhin ko yun nung 10 years old ako)

5....last year's planner.. pero at least nagamit ko parin. scratch paper!

4....stickers... hindi voltron, hindi voltesV, hindi thunder cats at hindi transfomers ..HELLO KITTY!

3....cassette tape ni LALA AUNOR.. WHO THE... ni hindi ko nga alam kung pilipino nga ba yun

2....teks, isang bundle ng maliliit na cards na may mga eksena ng nardong putik at panday (1987)

AND THE TOP:

1....DIORAMA! eto yung science project nung elementary kami, yung naka lagay sa kahon ng sapatos na binalot ng plastic cover. May eksena sa loob gamit ang samut-saring toy figures na libre sa CHEESCARS (chichirya), isama mo na ang lupa at plastic na dahon ng xmas tree ... ang sweet diba? hindi ko naman masabing "OKEY KA LANG? E MAS MAGANDA PA NGA GAWA KO DITO E!" pero shempre di ko sasabihin yun, at least naalala nya ko!

nagkita ulit kami sa friendster nung classmate kong nagbigay nun, hindi na nya maalala na niregaluhan nya ako! or, baka nagdedeny lang!

itong taon na 'to hindi ko masyado naramdaman ang OCT 15, maraming nakaalala (SALAMAT SA INYO!) meron din naman na inaasahang maka-alala pero dedma.. mag isa lang ako maghapon, di kasi ako pumasok, magdamag din ako nanood ng shaider at bioman sa youtube.. tsaka natulog!

at syempre umuulan na naman. WHAT'S NEW?!

HAAAY! HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!

HABERDEY!

For 26 years the sky's always lamenting on the second week of October, that's YEAR-AFTER-YEAR-AFTER-YEAR, well probably it's just adjusting with my mood, you know ... birthday blues

I was thinking, how am I going to celebrate my birthday this year? well, not really celebrate-CELEBRATE because I'm not really the bloke who's extravagant towards anything or something egocentric, specially if I'm the one burning credit cards, I've never really tried having a huge bash just to remind everyone that I'm another year older... (pakshet!)... the last time a blew a candle was in 1987... GREAT i was just 2 years old then (whatevz)

So after two decades of spending a sad and lonely Oct 15's, I was thinking of doing it differently this time...

Perhaps I'll climb a mountain... Kota Kinabalu (the highest peak in south east asia!) is the perfect choice. Unfortunately, when I checked the mountain cabins, they're all packed. Apparently you have to do the reservation six months ahead of time. So maybe next year.

or... Getting lost outside Manila, ALONE. That would be quite an adventure, I will buy the next ticket bound to who-knows-where and Im going to spend the weekend alone trying to be a nomad with just a backpack and a heap of guts, pretendin Im a contestant of the Amazing Race. That would be so effing great...and expensive (dang!)

How about a Jolli-Birthday? yeah, as in Jolibee party complete with party hats, mascots and ketchup-y spaghetti. That was my dream party that was never realized, so I will make it happen this time. That would be F-U-N. All attendees will be grown-ups and we will be playing silly games like kids and make Hetty (the spaghetti mascot) dance a strip tease! WOoot-woow!

hmmm... That would be FFFFERFECT!

But for now, I know y'all been thinking of possible gifts (FOR ME OPKORS!) so fret no more, because here's my WISH LIST:

1. Jacket (preferably Nike)
2. pair of black socks
3. nike air turbulence (white)
4. lip balm (no fruity flavor please)
5. iPod nano (redesigned with video)
6. photoshop installer (pirated)
7. wooden rosary
8. signed photograph of manny paquiao
9. lacoste perfume (green)
10. a tray of ferrero rocher
11. a good massage
12. starbucks stainless tumbler
13. boxer shorts (small-medium)
14. havaianas (size 39-40)
15. moroccan mint tea bags (coffee bean & tea leaf)
16. a birthday card (with 1k pesos inside)
17. a beach towel
18. advil capsules/gel capsules
19. nike cap
20. WORLD PEACE!

Please coordinate, just to make sure na walang madodoble...
HAHAHAHA

Here Yeah!

Desperate Houswives Insults Filipinos

In the Premiere of Desperate Housewives Teri Hatcher made a remark about Filipinos. She was talking to her doctor and then she said

"Okay, before we go any further, can I check those diplomas? Coz I would just like to make sure they are not from some med school in the Philippines."

I dont know if I have the onion skin syndrome but

THIS IS SO WRONG!

GAGO BA SILA?!
That remark was unnecessary and the scriptwriter should have been a little careful. They bulldozed an entire workforce of Filipinos in the health care career. and teri hatcher is a popular figure, so she should also be responsible enough to refuse delivering such lines.

I hope that when they need medical care, they end up being taken cared of by a Filipino nurse

so calling all Filipino nurses and doctors in the US, whenever you encounter the name MARC CHERRY (he's the episode writer) Use the largest gauge of syringe and don't use any anesthesia (when necessary)

A group of Filipino Americans demands for apology
from ABC and Desperate Housewives writers
through a signature campaign!

SIGN UP HERE

ZAIDO and the galactic shit

I'm an open true -blue Shaider fanatic. This show has been responsible in making the building blocks of my formative years.


That's the reason why I'm so ecstatic when GMA decided to do a remake. Well, my excitement shrank into an indiscernible form of matter when I saw the premiere. The show turned out to be a cheap rip-off. A total eye sore:

Here's why:

- I agree with my friend Jun, I hate the costume especially the helmet, it's like a cheap-robocop-wannabe-cum-highschool-project went wrong.

- The plot wasn't really well thought of, they did not even explain HOW and WHY on earth did lei'ar came back from what should've been his inexorable death two decades ago.

- Shaider fought evil galactic forces during the 80's (in fact, that's the setting of the series) suddenly he has descendants? Gallian, played by Dennis Trillo, happens to be the grandson of Alexis (WTF?). I'm expecting that this should be atleast explained with some sort of mystical cosmic blackhole intervening the galaxy and .. uhmm.. whatevs!

- The special effects made me wanna puke in front of the TV, the 1980's version is far better. On top of that, the new Kuuma Lei'ar looks familiar... reminds me of ANAK NI JANICE!

- Alexis has a pretty side kick, named Annie. This time its Gallian and the sexy sidekick - AMY... mind you, they're both wearing yellow and their families were victims of the galactic war. WOW, a truly moronic television coincidence.

- And because its Filipino made (kapuso particularly) then expect that the story line is 5% action, 10% has a poverty-prinsipyo element and 85% love story, total of ... 100% CHEESINESS. I mean, the original did not even focus on the Annie-Alexis love flick. What are they trying to do?

I can't believe I withstood the 1 hour pilot episode, I almost had an epileptic attack. GMA is making the legend look trashy by literally shitting on it.
I just hope that there will be an Anti-ZAIDO rally soon blocking the senate building or marching across EDSA.


But there's one commendable thing. Paolo Ballesteros is sooooo pretty as Ida. I bet its a dream come true! (good thing they dropped the disco ball head dress)

GREY'S ANATOMY SEASON 4 : up and running

Finally... After the longest wait and what seemed to be like eons and light years of anticipation, the new seasons of TV shows are finally here, up to heat both my iPod and PC.

On top of it, GREY'S ANATOMY is back!!!
What will happen to these pack of adulterous medical people? (obviously I can relate... not just because I'm in this field, but also, I'm an adulterous bloke)

Last summer, the season finale left me hanging in the middle of nowhere and my jaw dangling loosely. so from that point, I'm like a cryoprecipitate waiting for an order, an absolution.

Until I saw this preview, and I'm like a little boy staring at my wrapped presents under the Christmas tree. While watching it, all my vessels were dilated and my cardiac contraction felt like it's in suspended animation, afferent nerve endings ceased functioning and neuron conduction's in split second delay.

WOW I just love how they pull that premiere...
Izzie, Meredith, Karev and the scrupulous Christina yang (my favorite character) delivered the ripped rules of Dr. Bailey from the first episode of the show (back when they are in the bottom of the medical food chain), this time it's their turn, and it is so amazing to see fresh new faces ... simply genius!

I AM SO effing EXCITED
SERIOUSLY!



You can download some of my favorite music from the series, for free.
CLICK AWAY!

green me

I have a goal to grab before I turn 30 and who told you I'm more than 30? fuck you! It's a long to do list I tell you, but here's a portion:

-have a wood laminated graduation picture (check!)
-get that PRC ID (check!)
-write a personal hate letter to willie revillame (check!)
-do a medical mission to a far flung community, at mag feeling turista (check!)
-for gawd sake! do something good to the environment (CHECK!)

YES, I just did!

Yesterday I went-out to do some tree planting eklat for the La Mesa Watershed. It might sound a bit pageant patty and little like a government official during the election season, but my intentions are genuine and environmentally altruistic. Also, I just want to do something different because "I... personally believe that we are unable to do so because, uhmmm, some people out there in our nation don't have uh, I believe that our, I, education like such as, uhh, South Africa, and uh, it should help the Iraq and the Asian countries so we will be able to build up our future, for us...(???)... thank you!" (if you don't know what I'm talking about... click away)


I don't have a green thumb, everything that I planted on the soil died in just a matter of days. I remember having this science project in elementary where we have to grow Toge from mongo beans... after few days, all my classmates' canisters have something sprouting out of their lump of dirt. Mine? other than the nasty smell of what seemed to be like a rotten kamote, got nothing on it. (I don't know if someone played a prank on me)

Since then, I never attempted growing anything green.

But when you reach my age (20 something), you will eventually come realize that life is more than just about yourself, you have a social responsibility. With an equivocal threat of global warming, you will then find-out that you can help and you should do your part in saving our niche.

So enough of being a health freak, stop eating green leafy veggies, your hurting them, listen closely... you will hear them cry whenever you eat Caesar salad!

SEPTEMBER 3, 2007


ako: pucha! malayo pa ba? tangna... tatlong kilometro na yun a!
ako (isip) : ok lang mag lakad... pero di ok pag nasira sapatos ko!
ako: tree planting ba to o alay lakad?
AKO DIN: DAMI MO ANGAL
ako: e kasi naman o...


forester : deforestation is a social issue ....
ako : deforestation your face, wala ba makakainan dito?
AKO DIN : SHHHH!
forester : you will be planting a banaba tree
ako : ano yun? as in banaba? diuretic alternative to edematous or suspected cardiac congestion? Lagerstroemia speciosa aka Giant Crape-myrtle or Queen's Crape-myrtle? endemic to south east Asian forest like of Thailand, India, Indonesia, Philippines and some parts of eastern India?
AKO DIN : AVER ... WINNER!
ako : wala bang maple or ebony?

ako : teka picture muna
--after 34 mins--
ako : last picture na peksman!
AKO DIN : GRABE, 30 SECONDS OF PLANTING, 30MINS OF PICTORIAL

--uwian na--
ako : mag pahuli kaya ako? para may moment
AKO DIN : WAG BAKA MAY NPA
ako : OA mo ha


--after 45mins of walking--
ako : shyet! parang di tayo dumaan dito kanina a!
ako : uhhm, guys? nasan na kayo?
AKO DIN : PATAY! LAGOT NA!


to see more of my tree planting-eklat photos click away!

for more info on how you can help save our forest, please contact BANTAY KALIKASAN at 1-800-527-2820 (foundation@abs-cbni.com) or contact the La Mesa Ecopark at 410 9670

If you think this is just a piece of shit, then go home nibble on your toe nails and wait until you die a miserable death of indifference!

the coconutter

I am a nurse, and all I want to do is to escape this mediocre life, I am always thinking that I am a victim of random fate when I was born, Why here? why not timbuktu or some hillbilly island in the mid atlantic? While checking other blogs, I stumbled upon this person, a modern-day filipino nomad.

then a cold wind of realization punch me right smack in the middle of my face. realization that what I'm thinking was shameful uber shameful.

this guy's so amazing and his story is so inspiring, and I thought of sharing them with you:

He's David Poarch
22 years old
High School Valedictorian
Ivy League Scholar
Mensa International Qualified
Triple degree student
NASA Employee
Half Filipino
Good looking

what else can you ask? WTF he got everything, but guess what ... he's back in the Philippines to live a provincial life.. pure nuts! If I got those credentials? I am probably showing my ass off the window for public viewing.



For all my readers who can understand the third world language, watch his story here

part 1


part 2


The Coconuter could either be someone who has a sincere and a noble purpose, OR he's just a genius turned bonkers. Nevertheless, I'm effing inspired by this bloke--he could have a birthmark in his butt saying "Ideal Pinoy" ... I hope they make a David Poarch action figure!

but I'm still leaving the country!

bahay kubo : translated

earlier this morning, I overheard my co-workers singing a familiar hymn, but the lyrics were undecipherable... apparently they're reading the lyrics from a pinoy web site

hilarious...

BAHAY KUBO GAY VERSION

Valer kuberch, kahit jutay
Ang julamantrax donchi ay anek-anek.
Nyongkamas at nutring, nyogarilyas at kipay
Nyitaw, nyotaw, jutani.
Kundol, jutola, jupot jolabastrax
At mega join-join pa, jobanox nyustasa.
Nyubuyax, nyomatis, nyowang at luyax
And around the keme ay fullness ng linga.

*rofl*

Marry Me Marie

NO she's not Kc Concepcion and she's making Kristin Kreuk and Riyo Mori feel so ugly.
She's Marie (ma-ree-yay) Digby
She's half Japanese half ... uhmmm ... Goddess!
I saw her on youtube, apparently she's playing it big on the net.
And then she was discovered by radio stations and her single is now available on iTunes...

Wow! I was bewitched by her diaphanous features and pure talent! HOTNESS!
she's covering different songs and making the original artist look crappy.



here's a Marie original, this composition is a tribute to her favorite TV character, Betty. luv'it!

Outwitting, Outplaying, Out GAY-ing China!

YEY! survivor season is here once again. And they're hitting mainland China this time, I heard they will be sewing-up shirts for export, locked inside a poultry farm with bird flu infected chicken and nibble on lead-intoxicating toys, last man standing shall win immunity! (hahahaha)

here's something not mentioned in the clip: the cast includes a gay Mormon, a former beauty queen (from a pageant held in the Philippines), a playboy bitch, a second degree female black belter, a male underwear model, Madonna's former backup dancer and a guy who believes that the Spice Girls reunion is the most significant historical event of the past 100 years (why not)

no doubt, they will definitely outwit, outplay, out gay each other in the end! HAHAHA